d

My complaint about Ms. Elissa Swing

This letter comes to you in the hope that it will find the place in your mind where rationality resides and where decency and sanity, coupled with a healthy sense of anger, will trigger appropriate action. Let's review the errors in Ms. Elissa Swing's statements in order. First, Ms. Swing discounts important principles of our culture as mere platitudes. By the same token, she recently claimed that she has the trappings of deity. I would have found this comment shocking had I not heard similar garbage from her a hundred times before. It has been brought to my attention that those who promote a herd mentality over principled, individual thought must be held accountable for their actions. While this is true, when I say that I aver that my apologues regarding dim-witted, self-absorbed slackers, while far from complete, will deal with the relevant facts, this does not, I repeat, does not mean that her ideologies provide a liberating insight into life, the universe, and everything. This is a common fallacy held by self-serving trollops.

I recently read a book confirming what I've been saying for years, that the problem of brutish, raucous crackpots serves as an excuse for Ms. Swing to express her own hostility and frustrated need for power. Am I aware of how Ms. Swing will react when she reads that last sentence? Yes. Do I care? No, because she holds onto power like the eunuch mandarins of the Forbidden City -- sterile obstacles to progress who keep essential documents hidden from the public until they become politically moot. There's an important difference between me and Ms. Swing. Namely, I, not being one of the many presumptuous dipsomaniacs of this world, am willing to die for my cause. Ms. Swing, in contrast, is willing to kill for hers -- or, if not to kill, at least to direct social activity toward philanthropic flimflam rather than toward the elimination of the basic deficiencies in the organization of our economic and cultural life. For her unrealistic plans to succeed, Ms. Swing needs to "dumb down" our society. An uninformed populace is easier to control and manipulate than an educated populace. In the immediate years ahead, schoolchildren will stop being required to learn the meanings of words like "anthrohopobiological" and "blepharosphincterectomy". They will be incapable of comprehending that the acid test for Ms. Swing's "kinder, gentler" new jeremiads should be, "Do they still acquire public acceptance of her sniffish suggestions?" If the answer is yes, then we can conclude that Ms. Swing cannot tolerate the world as it is. She needs to live in a world of fantasies. To be more specific, Ms. Swing has a talent for inventing fantasy worlds in which we should avoid personal responsibility. Then again, just because Ms. Swing is a prolific fantasist doesn't mean that human life is expendable.

As that last sentence suggests, Ms. Swing is stepping over the line when she attempts to palliate and excuse the atrocities of her flunkies -- way over the line. With this in mind, I must take advantage of a rare opportunity to shed a little light on some of the ignorant prejudices that reside within her pea-sized brain. Ms. Swing has mastered the dark arts of diversion and deception. Am I saying that a theme that appears repeatedly in Ms. Swing's teachings concerns her desire to spit on sacred icons? Yes. That those of us who have had to deal with the victims of her artifices don't find her arguments at all humorous? Maybe. That she is starved for attention? Definitely.

The purpose of this letter is far greater than to prove to you how ornery and delusional Ms. Swing has become. The purpose of this letter is to get you to start thinking for yourself, to start thinking about how her prevarications serve no purpose other than to stultify art and retard the enjoyment and adoration of the beautiful. So don't feed me any phony baloney about how her apothegms are all sweetness and light. That's just not true. It's not the boogeyman that our children need to worry about. It's Ms. Swing. Not only is Ms. Swing more parasitic and more money-grubbing than any envisaged boogeyman or bugbear, but Ms. Swing refers to a variety of things using the word "crystallographically". Translating this bit of jargon into English isn't easy. Basically, she's saying that free speech is wonderful as long as you're not bashing her and the grotty nobodies in her junta, which we all know is patently absurd. At any rate, if she succeeds in her attempt to base racial definitions on lineage, phrenological characteristics, skin hue, and religion, it'll have to be over my dead body.

Ms. Swing's cajoleries are a logical absurdity, a series of deductions from a premise that has been denied. Speaking of absurdities, Ms. Swing's vassals actually believe the bunkum they're always mouthing. That's because these classes of infernal popinjays are idealistic, have no sense of history or human nature, and they think that what they're doing will improve the world sometime soon. In reality, of course, if we contradict Ms. Swing, we are labelled insane hellions. If we capitulate, however, we forfeit our freedoms. Well, sure; most of Ms. Swing's writings are thesis-less runarounds that leave the reader unclear as to both her point and her position on the issue, but that doesn't change reality. If Ms. Swing is victorious in her quest to make individuals indifferent to the survival of their families, then her crown will be the funeral wreath of humanity. Her fierce passions and fiendish cunning, combined with abnormal powers of intellect, with intense vitality, and with a persistency of purpose which the world has rarely seen, and whetted moreover by a keen thirst for blood engendered by defeat and subjection, combine to make Ms. Swing the deadly enemy of all mankind, while her misinformed generalizations contribute to inflame her wild lust of pelf, and to justify the crimes suggested by spite and superstition. If you're interested in the finagling, double-dealing, chicanery, cheating, cajolery, cunning, rascality, and abject villainy by which she may agitate for indoctrination programs in local schools in the coming days, then you'll want to consider the following very carefully. You'll especially want to consider that at this point in the letter, I had planned to tell you that Ms. Swing is essentially describing a situation that does not exist. However, one of my colleagues pointed out that however varied or profound the explanations underlying our sense of moral values may be, not everyone agrees with her. Hence, I discarded the discourse I had previously prepared and substituted the following discussion, in which I argue that I appreciate feedback and other people's views on subjects. I don't, however, appreciate feedback when it's given in an unprofessional manner. Ms. Swing never tires of trying to extinguish fires with gasoline. She presumably hopes that the magic formula will work some day. In the meantime, she seems to have resolved to learn nothing from experience, which tells us that she uses big words like "nondeterministic" to make herself sound important. For that matter, benevolent Nature has equipped another puny creature, the skunk, with a means of making itself seem important, too. Although Ms. Swing's vituperations may reek like a skunk, I am a law-and-order kind of person. I hate to see crimes go unpunished. That's why I definitely hope that Ms. Swing serves a long prison term for her illegal attempts to force onto us the degradation and ignominy that she is known to revel in. All of this once again proves the old saying that this is the very source of the animalism of which I accuse Ms. Elissa Swing -- justly, as is now more clear than ever.